Happy 2018!
We're finally settling back into routine after a whirlwind December. I didn't do any homeschooling for the entire month, and I'm glad we didn't add that pressure (it was almost THREE WEEKS before my throat and mouth were comfortable enough to read aloud to Judah after my tonsillectomy on December 1st!) I'm so glad we can go back to our special quiet time together. Plus, we added so many new storybooks to our collection.
OUR CHRISTMAS DAY
We opened presents with the boys and then hosted early Christmas breakfast with my family. The snow was falling so beautifully and we were able to linger with my mom and siblings while Abram napped (attempted, anyway . . . who are we kidding, even babies can't nap during the Christmas excitement) and Judah marveled over his new gifts.
Afterwards, we drove over to John's parents' house, which isn't far, and spent the rest of the day snuggling under blankets, listening to the kids chase each other through the house, and watching the snow blanket everything with a coat of white. It was peaceful and calming; just the way Christmas should be.
HOW WE GAVE
John and I made an effort to be mindful of how much we focus on the "getting" part of Christmas. With two sets of grandparents, multiple cousins, and doting aunts and uncles, it's only natural that there were going to be a lot of gifts being given, even if they were small.
So, John and I decided to try out the Four Gifts Rule this year. We gave just four presents each to our children*, in addition to the contents of their stockings. You may have heard of this before:
Something you want- a tent
Something you need- a set of flannel sheets (skiing polar bear print!)
Something to wear- very soft and adorable snow yeti print pajamas
Something to read- Iggy Peck, Architect
The benefits of using these parameters were greater than I imagined. Judah wasn't overwhelmed, and didn't tear through gift after gift without gratitude. Instead he took time to savor each gift opened.
It also trained us as parents to really meditate on our purchases. If we were only going to give four, they had to be perfect. We could also afford to spend a little more of our Christmas budget on each gift, focusing on higher quality, longer-lasting presents.
And here is something else that a friend pointed out to me: using this method of giving early in life sets up our children's expectations for future Christmases. Instead of anticipating a pile of gifts under the tree and inevitably being disappointed when their expectations aren't met, they'll understand our family's way of giving ahead of time. Any "surprises" from Dada and Mama are really extra special!
It's less consumeristic, and gives us some boundaries too. Because who doesn't want to give their kids the world on Christmas morning? This worked out really, really well for our 3 year old and I'm interested to see it play out if we choose to repeat next year.
*We really only did this for Judah this year. Abram is only 10 months old, so he only got a book and a toy under the tree. He mostly just played with wrapping paper!
MY CHRISTMAS AH-HA
In previous years, I'd been a little . . . how do I say this? CONTROLLING with what others gifted to Judah. It wasn't because I'm snobby . . . I just didn't want things around the house that he wouldn't play with or that would be too big for our smallish home. So, I would make "suggestions" to grandparents, etc. about what might be appropriate gifts for him. Carefully selected and curated from Amazon (Prime!) by yours truly. I always knew what he was opening on Christmas morning from various relatives and it gave me peace to know that no one was going to give him a 20lb teddy bear that we couldn't fit in the car, much less in his little bedroom.
But that left very little room for people to creatively express their love to my son.
Judah (and now Abram, as well) have relationships with all their aunts, uncles, and their wonderful grandparents. These adults know them well, and have insight into their interests, passions, what makes them happy. Additionally, GIVING is a LOVE LANGUAGE spoken by many people in our family. If I control what they give, I rob them of the opportunity to imagine what my children might enjoy.
So this year, we made no "suggestions." I was just as surprised as my sons when they tore away the Christmas wrappings. It was so exciting and wonderful, for everyone! I loved seeing their ideas of what they wanted to give, and they got to see our kids light up when they opened gifts they chose.
Also, no one gave anyone a 20lb teddy bear ;)
So, that's all of our 2017 Christmas. I hope yours was a truly blessed and happy holiday.
We're finally settling back into routine after a whirlwind December. I didn't do any homeschooling for the entire month, and I'm glad we didn't add that pressure (it was almost THREE WEEKS before my throat and mouth were comfortable enough to read aloud to Judah after my tonsillectomy on December 1st!) I'm so glad we can go back to our special quiet time together. Plus, we added so many new storybooks to our collection.
(All the cousins in their Christmas Eve pajamas. All the little girls posed so sweetly, and all the little boys took off as soon as the shutter was fired!)
We opened presents with the boys and then hosted early Christmas breakfast with my family. The snow was falling so beautifully and we were able to linger with my mom and siblings while Abram napped (attempted, anyway . . . who are we kidding, even babies can't nap during the Christmas excitement) and Judah marveled over his new gifts.
HOW WE GAVE
John and I made an effort to be mindful of how much we focus on the "getting" part of Christmas. With two sets of grandparents, multiple cousins, and doting aunts and uncles, it's only natural that there were going to be a lot of gifts being given, even if they were small.
So, John and I decided to try out the Four Gifts Rule this year. We gave just four presents each to our children*, in addition to the contents of their stockings. You may have heard of this before:
Something you want- a tent
Something you need- a set of flannel sheets (skiing polar bear print!)
Something to wear- very soft and adorable snow yeti print pajamas
Something to read- Iggy Peck, Architect
The benefits of using these parameters were greater than I imagined. Judah wasn't overwhelmed, and didn't tear through gift after gift without gratitude. Instead he took time to savor each gift opened.
It also trained us as parents to really meditate on our purchases. If we were only going to give four, they had to be perfect. We could also afford to spend a little more of our Christmas budget on each gift, focusing on higher quality, longer-lasting presents.
And here is something else that a friend pointed out to me: using this method of giving early in life sets up our children's expectations for future Christmases. Instead of anticipating a pile of gifts under the tree and inevitably being disappointed when their expectations aren't met, they'll understand our family's way of giving ahead of time. Any "surprises" from Dada and Mama are really extra special!
It's less consumeristic, and gives us some boundaries too. Because who doesn't want to give their kids the world on Christmas morning? This worked out really, really well for our 3 year old and I'm interested to see it play out if we choose to repeat next year.
*We really only did this for Judah this year. Abram is only 10 months old, so he only got a book and a toy under the tree. He mostly just played with wrapping paper!
MY CHRISTMAS AH-HA
In previous years, I'd been a little . . . how do I say this? CONTROLLING with what others gifted to Judah. It wasn't because I'm snobby . . . I just didn't want things around the house that he wouldn't play with or that would be too big for our smallish home. So, I would make "suggestions" to grandparents, etc. about what might be appropriate gifts for him. Carefully selected and curated from Amazon (Prime!) by yours truly. I always knew what he was opening on Christmas morning from various relatives and it gave me peace to know that no one was going to give him a 20lb teddy bear that we couldn't fit in the car, much less in his little bedroom.
But that left very little room for people to creatively express their love to my son.
Also, no one gave anyone a 20lb teddy bear ;)
So, that's all of our 2017 Christmas. I hope yours was a truly blessed and happy holiday.
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